Newsletter #1

This is the first newsletter for the newest/oldest club, Old Man Adventure Club.
OMAC will put out additional issues on an occasional basis. We look forward to
educating the readers on what’s happening in the world of older men. Let’s begin!

It’s been a busy first couple of months to 2023. Here are some lists:

List of recent old man adventures:
● Various ski outings. (Up, down, and across.)
● Half marathon with daughter. (Not much up and down in Savannah, so mostly
across)
● Reorganizing a friend’s basement fly tying collection. (Down)
● Various surf outings. (Across, with minor ups and drowns… I mean downs)
● Bowling (Across to what was up, but are hopefully going down)
● Yelling at pigeons (Up)
● Visiting doctors (Ups and downs)
● Consoling after championship losses (Downs)
● Sitting Shiva (Downs)
● Filing taxes (Down)
● Probably a bunch of other stuff (Various directions)

Rhyming advice for old men (…some of them rhyme)
● Stretch after and before, and you’ll only be a little sore.
● Too much cheese, and butt cheeks you’ll squeeze.
● Everyday please brush and floss, if you want your teeth.
● Read ‘em and weep, (guidance for the book Old Yeller)
● If at first you didn’t succeed… that was decades ago, so who gives a shit.

When all your friend get up and run,
assume it was your latest pun,
(alternative ending)
if you didn’t bless them with verbal art,
Assume you cut loose a nasty fart.

List of good deeds:
● The deed to my house
● The deed to my car
● The deed….

Google searched old man news.

One of the oldest men in the USA turns 109 and celebrates with a belly dancer.

March 9th is Bobby Fisher’s birthday! He was a young man playing an old man’s game. (Better than an old man trying to play a young man’s game. TOM BRADY!)

Ol’ man health advice.
The health letter of the day is L:
● L- the roman numeral for 50. (The Romans invented the birthday saying “over el
hill.”)
● L- the letter for vertebrae. (Keep those LiL’ fuckers aLigned)
● L- the first letter of the words your kids so dearly want you to say aloud before
you die. (Liquid assets)

Upcoming OMAC adventures.
● Old Man Ironman triathlon. Hike, canoe, bike. Hike the historic Darling rd in Berlin Vermont, includes a telling of The Great Wolf Hunt of 1803. Canoe the Dog River from Jyles house to the Winooski River. Bike over two legal trails to return to Jyles house for a pizza party!
Date TBD
● Ping pong tournament in the newly renovated OMAC barn.
Date TBD (probably multiple times)
Renovation TBD (to be done)
TBD (tricky backhand dad, that’s you Pop)

Old Man Adventure Club is seeking new/old members.
Please send a text request for an application.